New Mecury Media


Trail of Tacos Part 3

by RW Spisak

They had tried it, they tried it in several places thinking that food would draw them out for really low even "popular" prices. However the serving trailers and food trucks dressed in their national guard camo were considered off putting. They added no warmth whatsoever to the operation.

They made no marketing advantage there.  President Trump had forced himself upon Congress and got a massive paramilitary response team to assist in policing the para-meritocracy.  And since this gargantuan project this billion burro parade had such a lively birthing. President Tromp assured the American people that soon, very soon 10 Million illegal aliens will be deported, "well within the year". 

Karl Rove was conjured from his crypt to draft the operating documents. It was deemed the dual prong approach was best, on the one hand the piñata of a thousand blows and on the other the magick stuffed burrito of good fellowship.   The drones were released without fanfare. The disputed folktales later suggested they were employed on a new front of the ever popular war on drugs. Other more technical voices were suggesting these myriad flying bloodhounds were on the trail of some other two legged prey. 

Hackers forced several to earth and discovered their technology was limited to audio detection technology and propulsion with very little else beside very advanced telemetry.  We subsequently leaned through a WikiLeek, that they (we) were recording conversations, detecting and logging any Spanish overheard or visible or even mere Spanglish all for Immigration's Spotter Daughter program. This data was relayed instantly to ICE and maps were being made, remade, interpreted and misinterpreted hourly. 

The other prong of this toro terribulus was to build up a season of events; symposia, sporting events, and musical performances backed through massive federal - "Iraq-level" funding. All performances were regionally adjacent to the Tex/Mex border.  Fund had been found for special studies Univicetal opened a brand new huge video and film studio. Possessing the latest in production advances and equipment just being installed in studios in Madhatten and Blubank.  

The brigade of Burros was regular  fodder for every daytime tv show with Salsa Sarah's sweet yet calculating face now visible on burro back from Caracas to the Caucuses and from Barcelona to Brazil.  Recently ground was broken, actually (fracked) right down the BLOCK for a world class HISPANO-Disney Park.  Featuring the stories we know and love, Zorro, El Cid, Zapata, its opening and first performances will coincide with the arrival of the billion burro bombadeers.  

While the Billion Burro Parade was officially all volunteer what with college vouchers to the new Tejas Universidad and since every burros rider had accepted money that would allow them to repatriate to the Motherland in pure comfort. The dramatic March took on a whole new spicy taste.  While the official stipend and award programs were pegged to the price of the pesos in Paris, Yet, It was rumored that some riders were being paid as much as $2000.00 per day, plus a repatriation dowry set at 10,000. (Actual figures may vary ) as long as they stayed with the herd through to Tijuana. 

Others had lucrative book deals and nearly everyday, some national or international magazine show, brought their sattelight cameras and did their helicopter interviews. Maximo had confided that he and his spousa were well on their way to naturalized status, when suddenly the factory where he made new Ford Falcons was closed packed up and moved lock stock and barrel to Guadalajara. 

The next two companies who hired him, let him go as one by one good factory jobs fled to the third, fourth, fifth and six world. Mi Amigo Senator you must help me and my family, my brother turned us in to Homeland Insecurity, and since I'm jobless we only have our family stoda to house the kids and I. Sarah sat propped a top her burro, ready cosmetic mirror tightly gripped at her side. Awaiting the next ever-near camera and impending interviewer (s) appeared. Salsa Sarah despite her domestic goddess merit badges was apparently happy enough to leave Todd at home with the ever expanding brood. Down in Borderland a monthlong Mariachi festival was announced as were a series of internationally televised dance contests.

All with a Latin beat. Each night would see a different popular tv show televised from the strip live to an enthusiastic global audience.  There were fundraising for the "dancing Chevy" museum where styled automobiles were showcased and daily demos were established. The new "Hernando Desoto" and "Cotez in Mexico" movies both got there start during casting calls held during these nonstop fiestas, held this period. Subsidized Housing, comprehensive school voucher programs and an abundance of construction jobs provided a fantastic growth incentive like nothing the world had seen. The havacado-in-the-hand component.  . . . 

With a fresh rich wave of multi-cultural programming across the country, and the expansion of three new multilingual channels and the public eye soaking in a new generation of Hispanic oriented tales of the old west, we saw the remaking the Zorro myth with Emilio Estavez, and the new Jimmy Smits vehicle the 3D Apache legend of Geronomo both on the lips of little girls and boys from Pomona to Philadelphia.  Even Brad Pitt got into the act with a reimagining of the smashing of the Spanish fleet off the coast of Britain. This time Antonio Banderas and the Spanish Fleet capture the English Queen. Ethnic pride was said not to have bloomed, but erupted rashly across the bottomlands, and well before Sister Sarah's Billion Burro Brigade arrived at the main stage, the National Dialogue had shifted from a sense that these 23 million hard working Hispano-Americanos should not be ex-patriated but cherished not just for their rich Ibero-Cartheginian heritage, but also through the rich admixture with the rich bloodlines of Indigenous peoples from Peru through Prudhoe Bay, Alaska. So it could hardly surprise, when with the newly energized and enriched hispano-heritage fever, vibrant with freshly gathered voices reaching across the border region. Cultural awareness and appreciation had risen to such a fever pitch when overtures (at first secret) and then very very public, a call came forth to the Mexican Grande Assembly and Constitutional Convention announced that they were arranging to to repatriate greater Tejas and the general enthusiasm would prove UNSTOPPABLE. The End

PART ! / Part-2 / Part-3